On our way to Surrey for incomprehensible reasons (okay, free concert)
Cleaning is a sport if you watch only sports movies while you do it, right?
Nothing says “accomplishment” like finishing your pro bono project on the final day of exams. Now, who wants to get day-drunk?
If I buy another damn bottle of Sally Hansen never-effing-dries nail polish I will be exactly stupid enough to get what I deserve, which is streaky goddamn nails after four goddamn coats with fucking chips in them
I swear to god I would rage-punt this shit across the room if this colour weren’t so fucking adorable
On my right, a fine craft beer and a kale salad. On my left, Triscuits and Cheez Whiz. The box and the jar and a knife.
MY BEACH BODY IS READY